The diy doctor

First of all I have to come clean and confess my adversity to doctors.It is nothing personal, really,it just annoys me to waist time and money at the GP.If it is not an emergency I usually go diy.With the kids I use my knowledge as a mother and,I have to say,quite sucefully most of the time.I am a mother of 2 who did born and raise her kids well far away from any form of relatives and their advices(except for their father of course) and I have seen it all .What I didn’t see myself,my dear friend Toni,whose kids are older then mine, did for sure.She can always dispensate good advise and remedies.With the dogs is pretty much the same:after 15 years that we have dogs in the house,once again we saw it all ,plus the fact that the travelling husband is an hunter leaves him with few tricks up his sleeve.When it comes to me, it is even easier: I can pretend I am fine,I can just believe it is nothing,I can try various remedies that every good housewife and mother should know or,I can turn to my other half.No,he is not a doctor.He actually works in finance ,thing that makes him absolutely unqualified to deal with any health issue( physical and mental) but,when in the army ,he was briefly trained as a nurse and this,believe me,can be very handy.He can do injections,he can stitch,(if really needed),etc etc.I have many friends that are the exact opposite of me and seem to spend more time at their GP then at home.That I don’t get it,probably in the same way they don’t get my pathological resistance to go to the doctor.I don’t do sickness in general.I am fine and very regular with annual routine check ups.It is being sick or having family members sick,that upsets me.It is a waist.First rule:always minimise!Despite my will to stay away from doctors and hospitals,sometime it is not possible.Last spring ,for example,in my kitchen there has been a bad fight between some frozen sausages and a big chopping knife.Unfortunately a third part was involved too: my hand.The palm of my hand,in fact,was caught in the middle .At first I thought it was only a little cut .I also had to go out that night and sure I didn’t have time for this stupid kind of incidents.When after two hours the bleeding didn’t stop yet and I already changed five plaster,I started to think that may be it was a bit more serious then I thought.My housewife/mum skills were not enough,but it was ok,the travelling husband was due home soon .Once home,as expected,he fixed it.He put an elastic band on my wrist and stopped the blood flow.I went upstairs to get change for my night out.I have just stepped into the bathroom for the last touch of make up when the plaster exploded and blood started to squirt everywhere……..It looked like a scene from a horror pulp movie and,of course,I was wearing a silk white blouse!I shouted and called for my husband but, still,I didn’t lose the hope that we could avoid the trip to the emergency room.I then have been given two choices: I could go with my own free will to the clinic or he had to cauterise the cut with a scolded knife.I hate doctors and hospital but I am not Mrs Mcgiver .I rang SJ to say I couldn’t go out but promised I didn’t do it on purpose and kept her updated for the rest of the evening with the. developments.I came to spend my Friday evening at the emergency room.While in the waiting room,I realised that my daughters looked like two trumps as we had to put them in the car already in their pjs.As opposite,I was totally overdressed for the place.Thanks God I had blood stain a bit all over me so that the doctors and the nurses wouldn’t think I was wearing fancy clothes and stiletto for their benefit.If someone is wondering,it was a recessed artery and I had three stitches .Much better then last time when I went to the emergency room with the tip of my index finger dangling still attached to rest of the finger only by a little thin stripe of skin.That time the hand was caught in the middle of a fight between a tomato and a chopping knife.They managed to stitch the finger back but the nerves were totally recessed and I can’t feel anything since on that finger.The only health business related category that I hate more then Gps are dentists.The reluctance I have toward them has a proper explainable origins due to bad experiences.When I was a kid I wore braces for what it felt forever.Name a type of braces and I got to wear it,even the ugly external one,but only at night…..I never really understood if my dentist considered that a punishment or a favour: true if you wear it at night nobody sees you and teases you but, have you ever tried to sleep with that thing inside and out your mouth?The orthodontist I was going was supposed to be one of the best in the area.He had an excellent reputation built up in years and years of practice.I am afraid by the time I became his patient,the years of impeccable and successful practice were too many and he was getting old and forgetful.The prove is that he perfectly fixed the right side of my teeth but forgot to do anything on the left one with the result that I still have my left vampire tooth.Fair enough I only have one and not two as I used to but,seriously?Years and years of braces and still crock teeth??!!?As a young adult my dentist was an old friend of my parents .Every time I was in his surgery,he told me over and over again about when he used to hang out with my parents,about when they were all young and,in particular, about that party during witch he was sure I was conceived.Now, I know it was the early seventies and they were very liberal and keen to fun but hearing it from him it was gross.Even more ,considering I was lying open mouth over salivating and drooling.Eventually I moved,changed dentist and managed to keep my encounters with her as few as possible….nearly none I would say………until this week.This week I had to call the dentist and make an appointment.It has been ten days that I have a persistent pain that is torturing me.At beginning I thought it was just the jaw bone hurting because I was grinding my teeth.Days passed and I tried to convince myself it was may be due to the cold wind…….More days passed and I am very aware that,as the pain is not going away,I need to see a dentist.Yesterday morning then,I was on the phone with my friend who had three route canals done and her symptoms were exactly like mine.Coincidence?I will find out on Friday…..and so will you!


12 thoughts on “The diy doctor

  1. Haha Ortensia, you sound like my mum, although she was a qualified nurse, and I can hardly ever remember going off to the Doctors, maybe only if something was broken, appendix’s had burst, or my tonsils were hanging out of my mouth….. Aaah, the good old days…..

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  2. oh dear-we have a lot in common! I am the same way. I am so very thankful for doctors-I just think we over use them. Now in the case of accidents-well that is a different story-I am so very sorry about your dental pain-that is bad pain. Best wishes my dear and keep us posted. Could it be TMJ? I wonder. I sure hope it is an easy fix.

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    1. Thank you dear and I am actually glad I am not the only be going diy😉and taking antibiotics as the very last resource.1 day to and then. Ok know what’s wrong with my tooth….in the meanwhile I bravely cope with my pain through arnica granules 😊

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