
And so it was an ordinary afternoon, and like every ordinary afternoon, I went to collect the girls from school. We got home and I made the fatal question they were waiting to hear back for months, “do you want a snack?”. Since I went back to work full time, in fact, it has been replaced by something sounding more like… ” Sorry girls I have no time . I have to go back to work. Sort yourself out”, with me throwing at them a bag of crisps.
Yes I know, shame on me, crisps!!! Anyway, let’s not dwell on it and let’s focus instead on the fact that since I am now working part-time, the after-school snacks routine had resumed.
This particular Monday afternoon it was a typical chilly end of summer day and so I thought that a nice cup of cioccolatti would do them good.(*cioccolatti is the word the girls started to use as toddlers, in their unsuccessful attempt to speak Italian, to refer to a beverage that’s nothing but hot milk with some cacao ).
Now that they are both in secondary school and they can properly speak Italian we still use the word and they can have it in their bedrooms to not waste any precious time that they could instead profitlessly use on their phones!!! You thought for a minute I was going to say to study, eh?
Anyway, let’s not dwell on that either and let’s go back to me, diligently toasting their crumpets and preparing their two mugs of cioccolatti. I put everything on a tray under the vigil eye of big years German who is hoping for something to fall and I start climbing the stairs, closely followed by Gino who, instead, is actively trying to make something fall, except he doesn’t have to make the greatest effort as I end up to do a pretty good job myself.
It all happens in a fraction of a second, I missed the last step and while I fall face down, the tray flies up in the air. The wall, the stairs, the carpet everything is covered in cioccolatti.
I looked at the devastation around me, and after an initial impulse to cry and run away, I take a big breath and I assess the damages trying to decide what requires my attention first. The carpet! For sure I don’t want it to get soaked more than it is already, despite the great effort of the dogs to try to lick as much cioccolatti of it as they can.
I send the girls to lock Gino and Kurt in the garden while I get a bucket and some bleach. I kneel down and start scrubbing, and scrubbing, and scrubbing. Half an hour later the carpet was of the exact same brown colour as it was half an hour before, but at least instead of milk, it smelt of bleach, along with my jeans that now have two white circular stains on the knees. I might try to launch a new trend…
Time now to tackle the stairs glass panels, that in the meantime were still dripping cioccolatti. Well, guess what? It’s hard enough to clean them without leaving marks and streaks in normal conditions, after splashing them with warm milk and cocoa is nearly a mission impossible. I washed them and dried them at least 6 times, and then I simply decided that the fact that at least they didn’t smell sour milk anymore had to be enough for me to be satisfied and work on the wall.
The wall! The one thing I should have washed first instead of last! A pity I only realised it three days later. Yes, you heard me, it took me three days, a bottle of bleach and one of cherry flavour washing up before I could eventually climb the stairs without having the impression that three sets of twin babies had just thrown up their last meals all over my landing.
And if you may be wonder where the travelling husband was in all this. Well, he was travelling, (eventually, after two years he went back travelling 🥳) and only came back on Friday, right in time to enjoy the cherry aroma our walls are now infused with and admire the new rug on the landing….Now, let’s just hope he won’t lift it !!!
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Reading your story reinforces my persistent and diligent search to find a single-level dwelling on a flat piece of ground … to minimize those eventual stumbles and falls in my retirement years … my trick these days is spilling a glass of red wine … yeah … I also a home with polished timber floors …
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Red wine is the traveling husband expertise here dear Ivor and guess who has to scrub it off walls,upholstery and clothes?🙄just it goes unnoticed 😆
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I call mine the wobbly whoopsies …
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You can paint a disaster picture with words that make me l laugh aloud, although I try hard to stifle the snickers. I haven’t spilled chocolate in a spectacular fashion, but you should have seen the day I dropped a big pot of pasta sauce that dripped into the oven and splashed on walls and floor. Thankfully no carpet was involved.
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Oh no…🙈was it cheese macaroni?
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The sauce was as red as tomatoes could make it and then some. It contrasted vividly with white walls and a very light floor. Aaauugghh!
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😭😭😭
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You’re back with a splash! We’ve missed your incomparable spin on married with children and two dogs. 😉🤩🤔
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Love your funny stories! Well, funny for your readers anyway… X
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Thank you dear…. I always try to look at the bright side 😉and that’s why I’m not locked up fir murder yet😆
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😂😂😍
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My friend is great to have you back!!!
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Better up than down, at least you were not damaged!
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Immagine if I also broke a leg,last time that I broke my ankle I drove with it and had it checked at the vet🙈
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Not such an ordinary few days after all. You have my sympathy.
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That sounds like a bit of a mess…
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A bit😭and thanks God I have plenty of rugs in the house to move around 😉
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If you ever run out just buy more and keep piling them on lol
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🤫😂
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Excellent Ortensia (yes I thought the girls were heading up to study). Your adventures at least serve to remind readers that there are always others worse off, and to be grateful.
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We should never forget that Rory😊
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