Nothing is like the first time………

Published on by ortensia

Two people I bumped into yesterday and both telling me about their selling or buying a house. That brought back the memory of when it has been my time to do that.
The first house myself and the traveling husband bought together, it was here in Ireland.When we first moved,we rented for two years a beautiful apartment in an old Georgian building in Dublin.I intensely loved that flat, to a point that still,now,every time I am in town and I pass in front of it, my heart sinks. We have been very happy there but it came the time to move on.

The excitement of buying the first house has no rivals.At the time it was just the two of us and our beloved dog Rudy.I remember the meetings with the bank for the mortgage that,in fairness, came quite straightforward.That it was before recession and the introduction of the stress checks that literally killed most of the buyers later on.I remember the evenings spent searching on line the areas and the houses.I remember the week ends spent going from a view to an other hoping the next house was the right one to buy.I remember the disappointment of been turn down because of a bigger offer.I remember the laugh after viewing such horrible collapsing houses with carpets even on the toilet,and when I say toilet I don’t mean the “bathroom”,I mean the actual WC. Most of all,I remember the joy when the mind was set and the offer accepted.Let the party starts:taking measurements, shopping for the furniture and decorations.All so exciting. At the time we only had a couple of bookshelves to bring with us an the tv. The moving was easy peasy. The first night in the house was special.It was the Halloween week end and we had no couch and no kitchen table yet but,that first candle light dinner sitting on the floor and drinking champagne,was the most delicious ever.

Few years in the new house and the family started to grow:the first child,the second dog,the second child.We went from three to six.The house had the attic converted and the back extended.Few more years and we started to feel a bit tight in there. Then we lost our so loved and never forgot Rudy and we welcomed the giant dog.Now we were officially in need of more space.It was time to move on again.

Unfortunately buying the second house is like going through the second pregnancy: you can forget to replicate those lovely sweet moments you had with the first one.With the first child everything is exciting:the shopping,the visits with the consultant,the last few weeks spent browsing around shops and coffe shops and,occasionally, laying down on the couch whenever you felt tired. With the second child,you think you will live that all over again but,you are wrong! First of all,you can forget the carefree shopping. You already have the most of what you need and,also,this time you have a considerably smaller budget.You don’t have time to wonder around because you have an other small kid to look after and, when you eventually manage to unglue him/her from your persona,you are too tired to go anywhere unless it is to work, where you have to go.

With the second house it is not much different.Like with the second pregnancy ,the initial excitement soon leaves the place to reality.Reality is that now,you must buy and sell:double the pain but not double the gain! While you go around to view other people houses looking for your new perfect home,someone else is coming over your house.That means that at least twice a week you must scrub the house squeaky clean,hide everything you don’t want estranged eyes to see,pack your full gang in the car and wait until they have finished to inspect your personal space and touch all your belongings.Of course you will take your revenge doing the same when it is your turn to go and inspect some potential new home except,you will have to hurry because after you might have driven for an hour,your kids are bored and you are afraid they might break something.Then,you also don’t want the dogs to start chewing whatever it is inside the car where,you left them,while inside yet an other crap house. You will never consider to buy this derelict but still have to listen at the nice but pushy estate agents and eventually dismiss yourself with the routine sentence:”I will speak to my husband to see when he is available to come and see it as well.I will ring you next week”.You know you will never ring,they know it as well. The husband,right,where is he in all this?He is in the office because,lets be practical, there is no logic on both wasting time.If the house worth it,then a second visit for him will be arranged.This can go on for months.Faith,patience and a full tank of petrol is what you need but,at the end,you will find what you want.It wont be easy.It will come the tragedy of having that fantastic house,where you have already pictured yourself living happily ever after for the rest of your life,snatched out of your hands.Damn cash buyers!You will be furious,you will be demotivated and no house will ever be like “That One”.

No other house will be like “That One” where you swear you left your heart until,you will find your new HOME. What it is meant for you nobody will take it.This time there will be a couch and a table since the start because, hopefully, the removal van had already unloaded your old furniture. This time it wont be as romantic as the first time but, sure,there will be champagne because it is a new start and every new start deserve to be celebrated.

85 thoughts on “Nothing is like the first time………”

  3. I so enjoyed your house buying story, and remember when me and Carole bought our one and only home. We had only been going out for 3 months and it was getting close to Christmas, and we weren’t to be married until September the next year, but we were so much in love 😍, and already looking around to buy a house. Then one Saturday morning we walked into this quaint weatherboard house 🏡 and we gave each other that look, yes, Yes. And that’s where we lived for next 37 years 😊☺️

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  5. This reminds me of a lovely movie “5 flights up” with Morgan Freeman, his wife and him tried to sell their apartment in the 5th floor ’cause there is no elevator and they’re old, while they’re looking for a new apartment as well. All the fuss for nothing at the end of the movie.

    Great story

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    1. Cool,what a coincidence 😀we were in Donnybrook,D4.then we moved ,in 3, far south (around 30 Kims from Dublin city center)and now ,in 6,we are far north.again around 30 Km from the city center but much closer to airport😀🏡

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  13. The excitement of buying the first house has no rivals
    I understand you very well, it happened to me and my husband, when we were looking for a home: what we shot, our tastes are very different, then finally … the miracle: found, we started to dance laughing like crazy. hello Ortensia bisous

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  14. A great read as always 🙂

    We were forced to move by a job relocation 14 years ago. We were then living in out first home. We really liked it and my wife loved having her parents nearby (next door in fact). Moving was horrible for Susan especially, and we still don’t really like where we live now.

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    1. I’m sorry to hear that,we were the same in Milan,never really like it,but I have to say I pare as I was,terrified by moving and living my comfort zone,now I would have no prob to move again……on the contrary…..may be there is a little bit of gipsy in me😉have a good day my friend

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      1. Thank you – you have a great day too.
        It has its compensations. Lancaster is a great city and I feel at home there. Our actual house and garden are OK but the neighbours are not so great.

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      2. We have great next door neighbors where we were and rat was hard to leave.I still go and visit them every once in a while.Here the house is well detached from the others but close enough to have befriended one neighbor and learned to despise the other😜

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      3. We have a noisy inconsiderate large family in the other half of our semi-detached. They don’t even acknowledge a hello. The noise from their kids is bad enough that Susan is looking into soundproofing.
        The other side have way too meny vehicles parked all over the place and he is always either revving his motorbike or doing something else noisy out in the garden. He is also a rabid brexit-voting Ukip supporter which puts him at odds with everything i stand for. A detached house miles from anyone is my dream!

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  27. Having two children, I could relate to the ‘second pregnancy’ thing really well!!
    As for the house-buying sagas, I feel for you, and everyone going through that. Our situation is different. The farmhouse we live in has been in husband’s family for years. So yes we are lucky from no mortgage.
    But.
    It is not ‘ours’ to do as we please. Anything that needs doing, I/we have to ask father in law’s permission …

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      1. 🤣
        I pay him rent for having my business on the farm and I pay him a hire fee for my truck 🤣🙄

        I hope you feel settled for a while now. Making your nest together

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  28. When it comes about family, surely it is something must be grateful. I enjoyed your post, really. even though I have not been in that phase yet.

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  29. Excellent post. I was checking constantly this blog and I’m impressed! Extremely helpful info particularly the last part 🙂 I care for such information a lot. I was seeking this certain information for a long time. Thank you and good luck.

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